An Entry Saturday, May 30, 2026
The Thiccctionary
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Hippopotamus grazing on grass.

Plate XXVII. Hippopotamus grazing on grass.

Photo by Gurth Bramall on Unsplash

Hippopotamus

/hip-oh-POT-uh-mus/  n.
  1. 1. A large semi-aquatic African ungulate (Hippopotamus amphibius) characterized by a barrel-shaped torso of extraordinary lateral breadth, short load-bearing legs, and a posterior silhouette that, viewed from any angle, reads less as biology and more as civil engineering.
  2. 2. colloq. The haunches alone constitute a structural argument. She grazes like she knows the field belongs to her, because it does.
In a sentence:

"The safari photographer lined up a wide shot of a thiccc hippopotamus grazing at dusk, realized the frame was full before she reached the shoulders, and quietly accepted that this was a portrait, not a landscape."

Etymology:

From Latin hippopotamus, from Greek hippopotamos: hippos ('horse') + potamos ('river'). Ancient Greeks named her for the water she walks into. They did not name her for what walks back out.

From the desk

Filed by

Eliza HartwellStaff Writer

The entry writes itself; I merely confirmed that the hippopotamus did not fit in the viewfinder.

Ruling ADMITTED, WITH A FOOTNOTE

Bart PrussSenior Cataloguer

The filer wrote 'civil engineering.' The correct term is 'structural engineering.' The lateral breadth is load-bearing. Admitted.

In the margin

Teddy VanceJunior Cataloguer

The ancient Greeks named her for the river she enters, which means they saw what came back out and simply decided not to address it, and I respect that enormously.

Also received REJECTED

Eliza HartwellStaff Writer

Submitted: a credit card, edge-on. Edge-on, it has a silhouette. Every silhouette deserves consideration. The hippopotamus taught me that.

Bart PrussSenior Cataloguer

It is a credit card. Edge-on. There is nothing else here.

Frequently asked

Is a hippopotamus thiccc?

Yes. Hippopotamus was admitted to the Thiccctionary on May 30, 2026 and filed in the Natural Specimens section. The ruling on file: Admitted, with a footnote. Every subject in the catalogue is judged on its curves, not its size.

What makes a hippopotamus thiccc?

The haunches alone constitute a structural argument. She grazes like she knows the field belongs to her, because it does.

Is "thiccc" spelled with three c's?

Yes. The Thiccctionary house spelling uses three c's, distinguishing the editorial register from the colloquial "thicc" (two c's) and standard "thick" (one c).

Sources

  1. Photograph by Gurth Bramall, via Unsplash. Catalogued under plate XXVII.
  2. Direct ruling URL: thiccctionary.com/is/hippopotamus-thiccc/, the shareable "Is a hippopotamus thiccc?" page.
  3. Cross-reference: Thiccctionary A-Z, H.
  4. Catalogued under: Natural Specimens. See related entries below.
  5. Editorial review: ruled admitted, with a footnote by the desk. Objections on file.

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