The Thiccctionary

To: The editorial board, present and future

From: The Senior Cataloguer

Re: The catalogue's continued operation in the digital era

Summary

The undersigned has been asked, on three occasions in the past quarter, what the publication intends to do about "the internet." The undersigned has been asked this question by, respectively: a friend of the Publisher who has not been reachable since 1991; the landlord of the building; and a young man identifying himself as a representative of an advertising firm.

The undersigned's answer in all three instances was substantially the same. The undersigned formalises it here.

The Position

The publication maintains a catalogue. The catalogue is a record of subjects. The record is, by tradition, kept on paper, in the green cabinet, third drawer. The undersigned does not object to the production of a parallel record on electronic media. The undersigned does not propose to maintain it personally.

The Junior Cataloguer (a different individual than the one who resigned in 1991) has expressed interest in maintaining an electronic record. The undersigned has noted this interest. The undersigned does not object.

What the Publication Will Not Do

The publication will not change its register. The publication will not abbreviate. The publication will not adopt the conventions of electronic correspondence. The publication's entries will continue to read as though they were typeset for print, because they may yet be.

The Junior Cataloguer is welcome to publish the entries electronically. The undersigned will continue to draft them in the established manner.

A Note on Submissions

If, as has been suggested, the public is to be permitted to submit entries by electronic post, the undersigned proposes a moratorium of approximately twenty-five years on the practice, after which it may be reviewed. The undersigned acknowledges this proposal is unlikely to be adopted.

Respectfully filed,
The Senior Cataloguer